![asaf avidan different pulses tar asaf avidan different pulses tar](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/qJ1HgpWAP6g/maxresdefault.jpg)
It seems baffling why one human would entrench themselves in such a miasma: I have been wondering the same thing.
![asaf avidan different pulses tar asaf avidan different pulses tar](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/gnhJ4Ceor_M/mqdefault.jpg)
Where I am living, and the town I find myself in, creates the same feelings in me: a pit of hatred and disappointment people who (not all, but most) make my heart slump and my brain boil – again, we can dispense with details and petty criticisms. I went in with semi-optimistic hopes but that (very quickly indeed) dissipated and has been replaced with resentment and upset.
![asaf avidan different pulses tar asaf avidan different pulses tar](https://a6p8a2b3.stackpathcdn.com/8YxeWax4C-WG1yA92R46_GS8f1E=/1200x675/smart/rockol-img/img/foto/upload/asafavidandifferentpulses.jpg)
Without getting into specifics: every component of it is utterly gut-wrenching: I have never been as miserable and bored by any job/workplace than this. To be fair, I hate every single second of it - but would never tell my employer that. My current job (shall not name-check) is, at the end of it, a pay cheque: the chance to facilitate a living a stepping stone to where I need to get. When you are obsessed with music and trying to change the world (through this medium) it can be frustrating and depressing working your way up to it – the need to have everything put into place, right away, can be suffocating and horrible. That perfectly articulates where I am at this very moment: eyes are on the horizon but my heart and soul are really not in it. Many have to work live an undesirable life and do jobs that are a ‘means to an end’. I think many, including myself, have to live with reality to a certain extent. Some say it as a bromide while others genuinely mean it: either way I feel I am letting myself (and them) down by not being proactive and brave enough. People say that to me a lot on social media: your loyalty to music and prolificacy will see you get where you need to be. In past years, I have been dissatisfied with work/life but always comforted myself with the same mantra: you are working towards your ambitions the dedication will pay off. From my perspective, things have reached a bit of a plateau: an intractable impasse that has really struck a chord and hit very hard. I have seen a lot of people trudge through their daily lives yearning for something better and more soul-nourishing. It is hard making real changes and creating a better life – not as simple as many make it out to be. Too many of us are content to sit in our everyday lives and complain about things: not taking necessary measures to resolve issues and unhappiness. The point of this feature is not, as you might think, to simply vent and boast but to raise an interesting point. I admire those who strike against domesticity and ‘normal life’ in order to consecrate themselves to something more fulfilling, impressive and original. Any ambitions and declarations surrounding following dreams (creative ones, especially) should be taken with caution and a pinch of salt. IT seems prescient to preface this feature with.